Silence in the library? I think not.

I had to call in at our local library earlier today. One of the books that I've had on loan was overdue and although normally I could have renewed it online, someone else had reserved it, so I had to return it.

The book in question was "Rough guide to MACS & OS X: 10.6 Snow Leopard". I've recently bought an Apple Mac Book laptop computer, so I needed a bit of guidance and this book has been very helpful. The information is clearly presented and well explained, without being overly chummy and patronizing. If you are a PC user but thinking of getting an Apple computer, I'd happily recommend this book to get you through the early days. 

Nowadays, a visit to the library is just one more of those occasions where I'm forced to acknowledge that I am getting old. They used to say that you knew you were getting old when the policemen started to look younger. I passed that milestone yonks ago; even the librarians are looking younger now, so I wasn't too surprised to find that the chap behind the desk looked barely old enough to have left school.

"Hi" he said
"Hi. I'm sorry, but this one's overdue" I said, placing the book on the counter. "I would have renewed it, but it's been reserved..."
"Ah, sorry about that."
He opened the book and passsed it under the bar-code scanner.
There was a pause, but obviously the scanner had failed to read correctly, as he repeated the process.
He detatched the scanner from its holder and tried again... and again from several different angles and distances.
It was like watching Harry Potter trying to cast a spell with a malfunctioning wand. The scanner just wasn't reading the bar-code.

Eventually, after a few more fruitless passes, he gave up on laser technology and turned to the computer keyboard to type in the book's identity code, long-hand.
When he'd finished, he looked up and said,
"Y'know what the problem is?... It's a book about Apple Macs, and this system is run on a PC..."

I burst out laughing.
You just don't expect stand-up comedy from librarians.
So that would seem to be another compelling reason why we should fight to keep our libraries safe from closure.

I write like...

One of the good folk who follow this blog (thanks again, Mean Queen) was very complimentary about my writing style recently, so when East of North drew my attention to the "I Write Like" site, I thought I'd see what it came up with.

"I Write Like" is a site which claims to determine which author's style your own writing most resembles. All you have to do is cut and paste a chunk of text into the space provided, then click on the "Analyze" button for it to give you its verdict.

"Jolly good," I thought, "I'll try my most recent blog post and see what it makes of that."
As you can imagine, I was really pleased to discover that I write like Douglas Adams.

I write like
Douglas Adams

I Write Like by Mémoires, Mac journal software. Analyze your writing!

Naturally, I wondered if it would give the same answer for other samples from the blog so I submitted another post for scrutiny.
This time I was likened to James Joyce.
"James Joyce! Blimey, how cool is that!", I thought.

Then it all went downhill.

A couple more posts were offered up for analysis and to my dismay they revealed that their style matched that of Dan Brown.
My dreams of being a literary giant were well and truly punctured.

Then, just for a laugh, I analyzed a business document that I had written and the result was...
disturbing.

Let me put it this way. If you were a manager and received a document that had been written in the style of the man described by Stephen King as "the twentieth century's greatest practitioner of the classic horror tale.", how do you think you would react?

Yes, I write like H. P. Lovecraft.

Dick Francis: Thank you.

There was a time when just about the only books that I read were Science Fiction with a smattering of Fantasy and the odd thriller. Then, one day shortly after Blight-of-my-life and I had moved in together, I happened to pick up a battered paperback by Dick Francis. Blight had read quite a few of his books, but I  had always been put off by the idea that, although these were thrillers, they were "all about horse racing". There was nothing else in the house that I'd either not read at all or fancied re-reading, so I thought I'd give it a try.

It was a revelation.

Certainly the story was set in the world of Horse Racing; the hero owned several race horses. And yet there was so much more to the tale and it was so deftly plotted that background never got in the way of a first class tale.

I went on to read many more of his books over the years and he has seldom let me down. His books draw you in and are pretty hard to put down. In fact, if I pick one up, even if I've read it several times before, I'll still read it yet again.

When I heard that Dick Francis had died, last month, I thought it would be a fitting tribute to enjoy one of his books again. After a quick search along the shelves in the spare room, I found that same battered copy of "High Stakes" that I'd first read over twenty years ago.

I've just finished it, and it is still a cracking good read.

Dick Francis : 31st October 1920 to 14th February 2010

Re-reading an old book in a new way

Unusually for me, I'm reading two books at the same time.
I know there are some people who will quite happily have several books on the go at once, but I prefer to stick with one at a time.

It happened by accident.
I've been reading "Stealing Light" by Gary Gibson, for about a week, but a couple of days ago, I was trying to remember a particular book I'd read many years ago. I'd been thinking about some of the worst names for characters in books and I had remembered Billy Danger. He was the hero of a story by Keith Laumer, so I did a bit of Googling, and spotted it in the list of his work in Wikipeadia. It was "Galactic Odyssey". I then discovered that the entire book is now available to read online.

As you will probably gather from the somewhat lurid cover, this was never going to be seen as a work to rival "Pride and Prejudice", but if you like straightforward, no nonsense space-opera, you could do a lot worse. Before I realized what was happening, I'd read the first couple of chapters.

It's the first time I've ever read a book online.

I doubt whether the experience will make me consider getting one of the various e-books that are appearing though. Real, paper books are still the most convenient way of reading a story.
When they produce an e-book that weighs less than a slim paperback, needs no battery and is robust enough to withstand falling onto the floor when it slips from your fingers as you doze off to sleep, maybe then I'll get one.

If anyone wants to suggest candidates for "The Most Crap Character Name in Fiction", I'll be delighted to read them.
Mind you, I reckon you'll need to do well to beat Angus Thermopyle and Marc Vestabule who appear in Stephen Donaldson's 'Gap' series.